Ray is a Project Manager at Triplar, a company specialising in shopfitting and commercial interiors. He reached out to us when his employer recommended that he seek specialist support and we have been helping Ray through some challenging times.  Ray has very kindly shared his story with us and also produced a video to encourage others to reach out for support to.  

“I started my career at the age of 17 as a bench joiner post completion of my apprenticeship. I was given the opportunity to join the site installation team where the hours were long but the overtime was great. The experience gave me ample opportunity to learn everything you could about our industry. I love the travel, I love the hours, I love the banter, I love the problem solving.

Fast forward to 2022 and I didn’t realise I had taken upon myself to try and solve every issue which I was in earshot of. Like most men in our industry, I bottled up all the stresses and strains, put on a smile and carried on. This was obviously not sustainable and ultimately things would fail.

My employer signposted me to the Lighthouse Charity and after speaking with their helpline adviser and a caseworke I was given six free sessions with a counsellor.  I attended these online sessions once a week. This gave me a space to say some things out loud which I had never said before. A place to say anything in absolute confidence was nice. But I had to be honest that all my stresses were still there. I still had my own problems to deal with and was still trying to solve everyone else’s. These sessions came to an end and I continued on with life.

Around two to three weeks after my last session I received another call from the Lighthouse Charity. Having reviewed my case they felt that I would benefit from working with a life coach. Google life coach and it reads very similar to a therapist but believe me when I tell you they are very different and far more suited to me. Not to take anything away from my initial counselling but I may have had a very different  experience if I had gone straight into life coach sessions being in the same mental place I was going into therapy sessions.

My life coach helped me look at myself. He has also helped me develop skills to deal with a whole array of aspects of life in healthier way. Life stresses are still there but I tackle them very differently now. I don’t onboard any other stresses anywhere near to the degree I have done in the past. I’ve had six out of eight sessions with my life coach and I feel so motivated and powerful. At the end of our last session I felt like could run through walls!

Some really difficult personal matters have happened while I’ve been working with my life coach and I dread to think how I may have dealt with these 12 months ago. I certainly feel like a better version of myself these days.”

Ray has now completed his life coach sessions and is focussing on looking to the future and applying the skills that he has learning during his counselling and life coach sessions. Thank you to Ray and his employer Triplar, for helping us to share his remarkable and inspirational story, which demonstrates courage and determination to break down the stigma and barriers about reaching out for help.